Kentucky Sports Radio
[Moderated by Matt Jones]
[Moderated by Matt Jones]
…or at least that’s what an editorial writer at the student newspaper, The Vanderbilt Hustler, thinks. The following piece was written this week by a female student. Enjoy:
So, every girl at Vanderbilt laments this at some point, praying steadfastly that this is just a Vanderbilt thing and not a modern America thing, but it still remains true: Too many Vandy guys are girls. Y’all have shown potential and we love that you’re intelligent, but it’s time to man up.
Last year, my roommate, a few of our friends and I made a list of things real men do not do. It’s time to dust it off for 2009.
Let’s start slow: No salads and no diet soda. Again, you’re not a girl, stop eating like one. While eating, remember: You probably shouldn’t be able to identify and compliment a girl with, “Nice Vineyard Vines bag.” This has happened. I was there.
Real guys don’t wear loafers or driving shoes. For $15 more, you can get the whole shoe.
And while the occasional pink or yellow dress shirt draws the eye of a lady or two, we’re grading on a curve here, and when a dozen guys stroll in like a box of Easter marshmallow Peeps, it’s a lot of look.
Unless you’re in black tie attire, no scarves — and really, even then, only if you’re holding a cigar and some scotch and it’s cold enough to cut a hole in some ice and pull a fish out.
And for the love of God, desist with the wearing of pants with tiny, tiny embroidered lobsters and ducks on them. Those are for the adorable tiny, tiny children in the J. Crew catalogue — not any guy who has a driver’s license.
Do you have bangs? You probably shouldn’t. If you can swing or flip your hair around, it’s probably too long. Tip of the hat to those who forsake the razor on occasion; playoff beards and ironic mustaches will always be touchstones of the college experience, so long as you avoid the horrifying wispy Shia LaBeouf facial hair.
You should know more about sports than, well, me. And golf and tennis don’t count. I should not be explaining to you what a 3-4 defense is. Core knowledge of football (pro and college), NCAA basketball and Major League Baseball required; at least passing knowledge of the NBA and NHL. Don’t fake it either. If, like, the Brawny paper towel man quizzed you tomorrow, you should know who and what these are: the Willis Reed Game, Pedro Feliz, “We want the ball and we’re gonna score,” and who led the Atlanta Braves to glory in the 1990s.
Real guys hunt and fish. Over break, I went grouper and snapper fishing offshore in the Gulf with my cousins; they wore camouflage pants, bled the fish and talked Southeastern Conference football. I know that’s popping and locking somewhere at Vanderbilt, but many of the gentlemen of Vandy could use an infusion. You know, mix a little rap and country into that indie music, Buddy Holly glasses bubble.
By the way, fighting is hot. Don’t forget that.
And yes, I realize all this is all wildly bitchy. But as my brother told me earlier, sometime the truth has to be delivered. I’m just the mailman, delivering the mail.
And, just to reiterate a point I made during football season: The girls at Vandy are incredibly hot.
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January 7th, 2009 at 8:27 pm
As a Vanderbilt graduate student, my white wine spritzer and I take offense to that piece.
January 7th, 2009 at 8:28 pm
And to the column she wrote.
January 7th, 2009 at 8:28 pm
That girl sounds like trash.
January 7th, 2009 at 8:31 pm
Hunting and fishing are not man requirements.
January 7th, 2009 at 8:32 pm
Harvard is beating #24 ranked Boston College 66-56 with 3:07 minutes left in the 2nd half.
Defillipo’d!
January 7th, 2009 at 8:34 pm
Boston College beat #1 North Carolina 3 days ago and is on the rocks to Harvard right now? Is that the largest high to low rpi win/loss back-to-back gap in modern basketball history?
January 7th, 2009 at 8:35 pm
Much to her dismay, what she describes IS modern, intellectual America
January 7th, 2009 at 8:38 pm
RPI 8 (North Carolina)
RPI 259 (Harvard)
Did I mention the games in BC? Now 70-63 with 1:05 left. hahahahahahahahaha!
Could someone leave a post over at Barstools in boston that they are chodes and this is another reason why?
January 7th, 2009 at 8:42 pm
lol Harvard is shooting 93 percent from the free throw line so far. LOL
I guess the hack a shaq won’t work if your behind to them late in the game.
76-63 with 38 seconds left.
January 7th, 2009 at 8:48 pm
FINAL 82-70! Harvard WINS!!!!
Matt, if you make a thread on this and I don’t get a shout out I will know how the Palestinians feel. Prepare for missiles.
January 7th, 2009 at 9:03 pm
3, she’s not trash. From a female prospective, she’s telling the truth. Metrosexual is just, well, gay. Don’t wear pink unless it’s like stripped in, but even then don’t make it a habit. She just likes masculine men, not men that are more sensitive than herself. Most men who dress and act like that are usually stuck under the friends category. I think it’s about time someone said it. I’m sure plenty of guys out there would agree to that as well.
January 7th, 2009 at 9:07 pm
#11 - Sure but Frosted Tips have clearly been the exception… blazing in Vegas since 1998 baby!
January 7th, 2009 at 9:08 pm
Guess her and her friends need to visit Kentucky.
January 7th, 2009 at 9:09 pm
Who the heck is Pedro Feliz… and why in hades doesn’t tennis count? I think Roger Federer and Nadal are pretty manly myself. Off to Google Pedro…
January 7th, 2009 at 9:13 pm
Aha! No wonder I never heard of him. I am an American League fan… don’t know many NL-er unless they are represented by Scott Boras and hence are in the headlines daily.
January 7th, 2009 at 9:14 pm
“Willis Reed Game, Pedro Feliz, “We want the ball and we’re gonna score,” and who led the Atlanta Braves to glory in the 1990s”
Also the majority of women at Vandy are not attractive.
January 7th, 2009 at 9:14 pm
“Willis Reed Game, Pedro Feliz, “We want the ball and we’re gonna score,” and who led the Atlanta Braves to glory in the 1990s”
Also the majority of women at Vandy are not attractive.
January 7th, 2009 at 9:14 pm
“Willis Reed Game, Pedro Feliz, “We want the ball and we’re gonna score,” and who led the Atlanta Braves to glory in the 1990s”
Also the majority of women at Vandy are not attractive.
January 7th, 2009 at 9:14 pm
Damn it, b1tch, golf is a sport!!!
January 7th, 2009 at 9:17 pm
Crap browser freeze again. Anyway, I consider my self a well rounded sports guy and I call sports poser on this bitch.
“Willis Reed Game, Pedro Feliz, “We want the ball and we’re gonna score,” and who led the Atlanta Braves to glory in the 1990s.”
I can’t tell you what any of these have to do with the color of crap but they aren’t significant and pro baseball is as borderline a sport as golf IMO.
January 7th, 2009 at 9:26 pm
This means you SAE…
if you go or went to UK anytime recently then you should know that one. really find a bigger bunch of
daddy’s money
pink shirt
Khaki pants/shorts
Mandals or those dumb boat shoes
Optional hat that appears old and worn, but is brand new
Ray bans with the glasses on their heads making the band useless
Oh wait…sounds like Vandy…I couldn’t imagine an entire campus of that
January 7th, 2009 at 9:35 pm
#21: Those are also the characteristic’s of a homosexual according to macon_volfan!
January 7th, 2009 at 9:41 pm
as a girl, i agree with most of those points minus the following:
1)loafers/driving shoes - i love them and they can be worked into a wardrobe without looking like a douche. i would pick a loafer over a basic dress shoe any day.
2)the hair issue she brought up is 100% determined by the type of hair and in no way can be generalized so easily. some guys can pull off longer hair (not talking fabio long, of course)
3)while basketball/football IS most important, golf should be up there, however i can do without baseball knowledge. all i need to know about baseball is how much cash to bring for beer
4)number one on my list would be a love of offroading, but i don’t think that would make the list of any girl who went to vandy.
January 7th, 2009 at 9:44 pm
and btw, like the op, i too see waaaay too many guys like the ones she describes. but i live on louisville, go figure.
January 7th, 2009 at 9:45 pm
in louisville
January 7th, 2009 at 9:45 pm
I dont hunt, fish, or wear camo but I’m within seeing a hot ass pic of this chick of leaning how and moving to Tenn….the state that has no income tax and ladies that demand real men
January 7th, 2009 at 9:49 pm
I believe you ALL are missing the point she was trying to make. She was not saying that Tennis and Golf were not sports– she was saying, Know a bit about sports and at least no more than she does outside of using Golf and Tennis as your only reference to sports–mix in a bit of knowlege about football, basketball etc.
January 7th, 2009 at 9:50 pm
PROBLEM WITH VANDY = EVERYONE THINKS THEY ARE ENTITLED TO THEIR OWN OPINION AND TREAT IT AS GOSPEL.
January 7th, 2009 at 9:51 pm
I think this gal is a complete redneck. Not that anything is wrong with that…
January 7th, 2009 at 9:59 pm
#22–not sure what you mean by that, since I don’t give a rats ass about people sexual orientation. I mean, I am friends with Matt Jones….
January 7th, 2009 at 10:03 pm
Alright. I did some snooping, found a picture of this Vandy girl blogger. She’s not good looking, I repeat. Not. Attractive. At least not in this picture (http://www.vandyright.com/?page_id=363 click on the picture for a larger image). I’ve got a message for her too, dress sluttier, use more makeup. Cute little college girls sporting little silver crosses are well and good if I’m hanging around with my mom (never), but for all other occasions I need to constantly be wanting to jump you. Oh yeah, hunting is mostly boring, fishing definitely sucks. But you’re right about the silly J Crew pants, scarves, loafers and indie music, unless you are specifically using said music as a tool to get laid.
January 7th, 2009 at 10:03 pm
Jimmie Connors would probably have failed her tests for the most part - and perhaps these guys, too: Bob Dylan, Mort Sahl, Dick Martin, & Larry King. But they didn’t do too badly. They all married ex-Playboy Bunnies!
January 7th, 2009 at 10:05 pm
Oh and she’s in college and seriously a republican.
January 7th, 2009 at 10:08 pm
Baseball bores the piss out of me. It’s like watching paint dry.
January 7th, 2009 at 10:24 pm
found the author on facebook. she’s butt a** ugly. not surprising
January 7th, 2009 at 10:30 pm
I’ve been out of the grind for awhile, but seems to remember a feller could do fairly well if he was able to confidently let his “feminine side” out without overdoing it. Now this. Well which is it?
January 7th, 2009 at 10:35 pm
http://www.dimemag.com a pretty sweet nba site for those that follow.
January 7th, 2009 at 10:36 pm
this girl didn’t get a bid to a sorority
January 7th, 2009 at 10:40 pm
Her columns in the paper are usually very well written, even though I tend to disagree with her views. I think the comments about her appearance are unnecessary.
January 7th, 2009 at 10:56 pm
I knew a gal like this in college. Big baseball fan, very conservative, wrote for the school paper. They look very similar…
January 7th, 2009 at 10:59 pm
Why, she’s commenting on appearances as well, and it’s all fun. Enjoy your highroad.
January 7th, 2009 at 11:03 pm
She’s commenting on things people choose to do, for whatever reason (wearing pants with lobsters on them, pink shirts, bama bangs). The high road is quite nice, thank you very much.
January 7th, 2009 at 11:07 pm
hahaha, ok
January 7th, 2009 at 11:15 pm
Nothing sucks like the big orange!
January 7th, 2009 at 11:15 pm
It is a turn-off when your date knows less about sports than you do (although the answer is obviously to dumb-down
until you can get home.) Please don’t go to my facebook and talk about how bad I look. I got in to the sorority I wanted…a
long time ago.
January 7th, 2009 at 11:19 pm
what are you #44, are scurvied British sailor? Oranges are a vital source of Vitamin C and headbands!
I look for the Vols to start another home win streak on Tuesday but, as I said earlier today, that’s why they play the game!
January 7th, 2009 at 11:22 pm
Yeah umm… golf is not a sport. If you’re 68 and can do it in your leisure time its not a sport. Hell, when was the last time you heard someone take a day of off work to go enjoy a day on the football field. 60 year old men take time off work to enjoy the leisurely activity of golf.
January 7th, 2009 at 11:25 pm
#46: the vols suck!!
January 7th, 2009 at 11:30 pm
The Vols sucked under Buzz Peterson. And Kevin O’Neil. And Wade Houston. If this is suck, I’ll take it…Right now I think the main problem is they still look for Lofton and Smith to kick the ball out for 3, but don’t realize that it’s Tatum and Woolridge out there instead. I’m impressed with Chism. When he wants to play, I think he’s as good as just about any big man in the SEC. 20 rebounds is a good night no matter who you play.
January 7th, 2009 at 11:35 pm
whatever happened to Jerry Green and that one guy who coached Chris Porter and Damion Fishback at Auburn? cannot remember that name for some reason…
January 7th, 2009 at 11:35 pm
Like I’ve said many times, college hoops is all about guard play. When you lose 2-3 starting guards like UT and UK did, it’s not easy to quickly replace them. More specifically, long guards will rule the universe as parity continues to proliferate. That’s why I love BCG’s recruiting of long guards like Liggins, Miller (maybe a SF) and Galloway. They just need more exp.
January 7th, 2009 at 11:37 pm
Tennessee should be a lot better than they are right now
January 7th, 2009 at 11:38 pm
Jerry Green took the buyout $$$ ($2million I think) and and sat on a beach for a few years, and then coached with Sampson and Oklahoma and Indiana. We know how that ended….Cliff Ellis was the Auburn coach. He looked great in sweater vests (Matt loved it) and now he is at Coastal Carolina. He took that job after Buzz Peterson(who got the Coastal job after he was fired at UT) left for the Bobcats to scout. It’s all connected.
/Cue ‘Circle of Life’, Elton John version.
January 7th, 2009 at 11:40 pm
51- good point. When those three turn it on this UK team has the capability of being a sweet 16 caliber bunch. How about Meeks though? He’s definately becoming a true super-guard like Curry for Davidson. He’s probably the best shooting guard UK has had since Derek Anderson
January 7th, 2009 at 11:41 pm
#52, you are certainly correct. Tatum and Maze (and to a degree, Tabb) are decent guards, but are all VERY inexperienced. They’ll need to grow up, and FAST!
#52–UT was OVERRATED from the start this year. Pearl said that and said that, and no one listened. I think UT could win the East or at least finish in a heat with UK and UF. Then UK lost to VMI and I though that maybe the East was realistic. Then the whole SEC collapsed in OC play, I thought a repeat performance was possible. I bought into the main-stream media hype about UT, rather than listening to the person who sees them practice each day. Big mistake on my part. I still think UT will be in the mix for a Thursday bye at the SEC Tourney.
January 7th, 2009 at 11:42 pm
MLB SUCKS.
January 7th, 2009 at 11:44 pm
from Wikipedia, Cliff Ellis seems to be a true Renaissance Man…
Ellis is a musician, an author and a gourmet cook. He’s even been an ostrich farmer. He and his music group, the Villagers, were one of the Southeast’s hottest acts in the mid-1960s. Before he’d ever coached a college game, he had published a book on the 1-3-1 zone press.
January 7th, 2009 at 11:47 pm
A few thoughts: I appreciate the over-all theme of her article, although not all of the particulars (I could care less about the NBA, NHL, and MLB). SEC football and college basketball are in a league of their own; professional golf is also terrific. The big orange does suck and Vandy girls are typically very attractive. Going to school at rural Sewanee, we were especially in awe of them.
January 7th, 2009 at 11:50 pm
Blay-Z - Are you Sarah? You almost have to be. The offroading comment gave it away…
January 7th, 2009 at 11:50 pm
Yeah Tennessee is in the same boat as Kentucky right now. Guard play is suspect, two excellent big men (Chism, Patterson), and freshman struggles. Should make for a great game on Tuesday! It’s fun to see the UT-UK rivalry back to where it should be. The SEC is SO wide open this year. I can easily see Arkansas (John Pelphry is the MAN), Kentucky, Tennessee, or Florida winning the league.
January 7th, 2009 at 11:53 pm
Toward the end of OT did they forget to play “Rocky Top”?
January 7th, 2009 at 11:55 pm
I don’t know, but that damn WOOOOO has drove me crazy since it was started in 99. I refuse to do the woooo…ruined a great song. (I’m partial to the TN Waltz myself, but RT will do)
January 7th, 2009 at 11:59 pm
okay all, good night.
January 8th, 2009 at 12:37 am
While I agree with some of what she wrote, it sounds to me that she is just a redneck..just because some people listen to good music(indie) doesn’t mean that I have to listen to shitty music(country and rap) for any girl..most girls do listen to shitty music. Also, hunting and fishing are redneck activities. People enjoy doing these activities and there’s obviously nothing wrong with it, but it doesn’t make you less of a man if you don’t. And to all the people who are bashing baseball as barely being a sport, you probably say that because you could’t hit a curveball when you got into Babe Ruth so you gave the sport up.
January 8th, 2009 at 12:47 am
and you are…?
January 8th, 2009 at 12:53 am
Andy Huenefeld
January 8th, 2009 at 12:57 am
wow, it’s been a while! i’d love to catch up, but, uh.. not on here, obviously. facebook?
January 8th, 2009 at 1:39 am
i’m an intellectual, a nerd i guess, and a radical leftist liberal arts grad student, but i’m also a volcano of raw, masculine libido, and i’ll f*** anything with a hole between its legs.
maybe i should go to vandy for my PhD since their women are clearly horny, young, attractive, and probably wealthy. good night
January 8th, 2009 at 7:39 am
Actually, I’m one of about 5 people in America under 30 that don’t have a facebook account. Shoot me an email. hueny21@gmail.com.
January 8th, 2009 at 8:16 am
Hey Beisner….don’t you have a couple pink shirts????
January 8th, 2009 at 8:59 am
I’ve worn pink shorts. Twice. Very comfortable golf attire.
January 8th, 2009 at 9:04 am
[...] Heh. Katherine Miller, a junior at Vanderbilt, finds the men at that august institution to be — well, for lack of a better term, girly-men. Hat tip — Beisner. [...]
January 8th, 2009 at 9:25 am
70, a couple? No. One? Yes.
And, at least is has sleeves.
January 8th, 2009 at 9:33 am
It’s funny because she’s telling rich kids not to act like rich kids!
January 8th, 2009 at 9:35 am
can we get a pic of this girl? she has to be hot.
January 8th, 2009 at 12:46 pm
That’s pretty funny, I’d like to meet this chick.
January 8th, 2009 at 10:12 pm
[...] for the guys on campus, some sports blogs in Kentucky (I get a little comeuppance with commentary on my looks and charms…which, you know, I started [...]